Is it a coincidence that God spelt backwards is Dog?

As you can tell by the title, this post isn't going to be embracing 'God' or 'religion'...

In my most humble opinion, the whole idea of religion is overrated. It's more of a ray of hope for those in tough times.

Think about it, if you had the chance to 'repent' for the wrongdoings in your life and be guaranteed a seat in this castle in the clouds, then you would jump at the opportunity. Fortunately not everybody thinks like that, otherwise I'd expect to drunkenly stumble past a long line of heathens wanting to repent.

And then we come to God...

This mythical apparently benevolent, omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresence being that created the world in 7 days- I know this is bogus because it took ages to create Ikea which is a miniature world itself.

Anyhow, my view remains Atheist, and I don't really see that changing. However as religion is such a subjective topic of society, no one person is right (except me)!

I apologise for this being so short, but I have just learnt that Cheryl Tweedy is now single :-D

"When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself."

Yes I know it's hard to believe, but I'm back! (insert evil laugh for effect!)

With the world on it's knees and politics in such a shambles- I saw the SB! signal in the sky and, like the caped crusader that I am, I knew the time was nigh! Out of the darkness I came, running to save you all.

However I do genuinely intend to publish some kind of deep and meaningful post today, so I shall return.

Until then, FEAR EVERYTHING!!!!!

This is it... for now

As many of you will have noticed, I haven't posted anything for over a month now. This is not because of laziness or idleness but purely because I have had a very personal family bereavement.

I won't be naming the relation or how we were related, out of respect both for her and the family- the last thing they want is to stumble across this and find I've posted her name on such a public place.

Since then I have been trying to carry on as usual but after the bereavement and starting college, I've realised that I cannot possibly juggle work, college, and blogging as easily as I was able to before.

It is with a very heavy heart that I have decided not to continue posting on SB! (for the time being), I want you to understand the joy I have felt at being able to post my own views without fear of a backlash, the 'team building' articles (starting with Operation: Epic Article... and going all the way to simply four blogs of very differing opinions on the same thing).#

I do have such a passion for creative writing and I am really grateful to the blogger network for allowing ordinary people to steal the limelight from 'big-time' bloggers.

I'd also like to thank the other three members of The Phenomenal four for their support over the last 10 months (although more specifically the last month) Chris, Ross and Luke thank you so much guys you have no idea how much I really appreciate it!

It's not goodbye for ever, it's goodbye for now.

Thanks and take care,

Lee :-)

Natural Selection favours the strong and the aggressive!

I feel I must take a leaf, or rather a petal, from The Confounder's book momentarily and vehemently apologise for my colossal paucity of posts lately, I honestly wish I could blame it on the fact that I was busy- however that would be a lie as I've just enjoyed my bed too much.

I feel that this is a good thing, because it has given me time to contemplate on what my passions are and, as I shall expand upon in this post, my absolute hatreds. Before I decided to go A.W.O.L I found I was either just posting randomly or posting my views on the p4's epic challenges, Surprisingly Bewildered had lost it's core values- it had become more of an extended page for the p4, there was no originality.

Admittedly this was my own fault, because I could not find the time to sit and think about good things to post, so I just posted to remain active and up to date.

I am back, but more importantly SB! is back to its good old self, back to the golden age of blogging!

I digress, the real reason I am posting today is because on my last driving lesson, myself and Blake were having our usual rantings at the problems with this country and we actually agreed on something!

We both feel that the chav race is growing at an alarming rate and something desperately needs to be done about it.

It has been concluded that the best way to cull pigeons is to set up feeding grounds for the pigeons to feed in, then when the pigeons lay their eggs, the eggs are taken and destroyed.

Using this logic then it should be easy to set up similar grounds for chavs- wkd stalls, free burberry stands are among some of my suggestions. Then when the chav girl and boys decide to become teenage parents, simply take the newborn child and give it to a more deserving family who won't call it something like Shaniqua or Sambuca.

Now before any human rights activist out there decide that this is a inhumane suggestion, just consider this....

First of all, they are chavs and therefore not actually human so human rights do not apply.

Secondly, do you really want a world full of Shaniqua's or Cookie's?

Finally, Charles Darwin's view of natural selection was hailed as a success, albeit shrouded in controversy, so surely this is just the modern world's version of natural selection...

No doubt I'll get some form of unintelligent dribble from any chavs who decide to read this, as the entire chav population collectively share 3 GCSE's in Construction they really should find a forum on the Internet where they can share their moronic gibber-jabber and leave the intelligent people in peace.

“The men and women of Afghanistan are building a nation that is free, and proud, and fighting terror - and America is honored to be their friend.”

What a brilliant quote from a ridiculous liberal...

However to get to the point at hand...

Luke over at 'An Organised Mess' has come up with an awesome challenge for the p4 team.

Given the recent deaths in the Uk and Us' assault on Afghanistan (8 UK deaths in 24 hours!) I felt I should really brush up on my knowledge of this topic.

My original instinct is to pull the troops straight out of Afghanistan, however this seems to be an act of surrender on our parts. When I continue to delve into this subject I found out that since we've been trying to restore democracy to this desolate wasteland, there have been almost 179 British deaths alone- this doesn't even account for the scores of fatalities this has caused.

So, to my second thought if we were to pull out of Afghanistan then there are a number of negative points which I should consider.

Take for instance, we do pull out, then surely the 178 deaths are in vain. If we really are there to restore democracy, then pulling out when we encounter problems seems to undermine the reasons those brave heroes went to war for.

Now I have no doubts than many will strongly disagree with the above, but that's the whole idea of opinions, we have the right to express our views.

Now I do agree that as per, Gordon Brown is being a typical bumbling wanker in refusing to send more vehicles equipt to deal with IED's and helicopters to provide the troops with easier transport to the strongholds those murderers hold.

I'm not suggesting that when the public make the epic mistake of electing Cameron into power that it'll all be solved because as much as he has promised, we all know that any politician never keeps there promises. (I'd vote Tory if I didn't think Cameron was such a tosser- UKIP all the way!)

However, I do feel that someone needs to step up to the mark and help those heroes (and there's no denying that they are), because if it wasn't for them, I guarantee that we'd be experiencing more terrorist attacks than we are.

If the labour government are happy to pay £6 million per hour to stay in the EU, then surely they can fund the necessary adequate equipment needed to help our troops...

"Madder than a bag full of actresses. And even more desirable!"

If I had to explain to you exactly what an orgasm would look like. If I had to paint perfection. If I had to sacrifice seventeen Lebanese prostitutes to afford one then I know what I'd choose...

If a 3.6l engine and 415 horsepower doesn't impress you then I should probably tell you that it also sports a six cylinder engine. This enables the porsche to have a low centre of gravity- which allows it to roar around any track.

The engine of the GT3 sets it apart from the other models although it shares the same basic 3.6 litre displacement of the standard 996 type so-called "integrated dry-sump" flat-six engine. It is actually based on the original 911's versatile, true dry-sump crankcase. The original version of the GT3 had 355 hp, compared to the 296 hp of the regular 996.

This engine gives the GT3 a distinct racing heritage that dates back to the Porsche 904/6 of the mid-60's, up to the Carrera Cup and 997 Super Cup and RSR racing cars of today.

The GT3's gearbox has interchangeable gear ratios and is more durable making it more suitable for racing than the standard 996 type 911 gearbox.

At 435 hp the 3.8 litre flat-six engine in the 997 GT3 and GT3 RS is the most powerful naturally aspirated six cylinder engine in any production car.

It really does just scream "POWER!"

And it doesn't stop there...

With more buttons on the dashboard that on a rather larger woman's blouse it'll keep those of us who are easily distracted amused for several hours, whilst at the same time offering a great stress relief for bumbling oafs like Gordon Brown. "Me angry, me push buttons fix country.... Gordon happy..." you get the general idea...

Now for the good stuff (courtesy of Top Gear- although this is referencing the GT2 :-( )

Overall Verdict...

The wildest, fastest 911 around – rear-engined, rear wheel drive and 523bhp of turbocharged silliness. See why they call it the widowmaker? We’d still take the GT3 instead though.

Comfort...

For something that’ll keep pace with a Ferrari 430 Scud on just about any road, it’s not half bad even over dodgy road surfaces. That said, it’s not exactly what you’d call a comfortable car to drive. And then there’s always the lurking suspicion that it Actually Wants To Kill You.

11 out of 20

Performance...

Jaw-dropping. A reworked version of the Turbo’s 3.6-litre sees a frankly insane 523bhp and 502lb ft of torque. That’s good for 0-62 in 3.6 seconds, 0-100mph in 7.4 seconds and a top speed on the scary side of 200mph. In a drag race, it’ll eat the Nissan GT-R for breakfast. And then come back for elevenses.

20 out of 20

Coolness...

Instantly marks you out as a tosser. But the sort of tosser who’s happy to die in hideous and immediate fashion. Which, we think you’ll agree, is the most likeable sort of tosser

15 out of 20

Handling...

The 911 is an icon of impracticality; the car the divorcee buys when he no longer has the kids to worry about. There’s a roll cage behind the front seats. What more do you need to know?

11 out of 20

Top Gear Top Tip...

Unless you really, really have to have the ultimate Porsche, save yourself 50 grand and go for the GT3. It’s just slightly more pure…

Now it's time to put it in the hands of our rather tame racing driver...

Some say that he actually choreographed the entire Thriller music video whilst waiting for his McMuffin, others that if you met him in a bar he'd be sat in the corner drinking Pimms out of a woman's boot...

All we know is he's called 'The Stig'...

On the power lap it scored a rather arousing 1.22.3!

II couldn't find The Stig's verdict so I'll do this myself!

"One word, AWESOME!"

For the win :-D

SB!'s Top 25...

The following are my top 25 (in order) songs ever. You will see the number it ranks in SB's chart, song title then the category it is placed in.

Under the happy category there are;
1. All Night Long - Lionel Richie - I defy any of you to not appreciate him!
2. Superman- Lazlo Bane - This is always guaranteed to cheer me up!
3. Cat Scratch Fever- Motorhead - maybe it's just my man-crush on Lemmy, but this is one of the happiest songs ever!
4. ZZ Top- Legs- Just for the lyrics :p
5. Warrior's Dance- The prodigy

Sad are as follows;
1. Everybody Hurts - R.E.M - Obvious really
2. Life for Rent- Dido- Maybe I'm just strange but this always gets me...
3. Hello- Lionel Richie - The lyrics, I defy to now feel an emotion!
4. Man who sold the World - Various, although this is the Nirvana one beautiful lyrics.
5. Stole- Kelly Rowland, the lyrics. It's all about a wasted life :-(

Love consists of;
1. Smack My Bitch Up- Prodigy, possibly the most romantic set of lyrics I have ever heard!
2. You Give Love A Bad Name- Bon Jovi, I am a huge fan of Bon Jovi and if this isn't a love song then I don't know what is...
3. Dancing on The Ceiling - Lionel, had to get one in this section as well.
4. Love is all Around - Wet, Wet, Wet. Very clichéd but appropriate.
5. Love Me Forever- Motorhead -for the win!

Guilty Pleasures...
1. 99 Red Balloons- Nena- look out for the Nine Lives cover!
2. Land Down Under- Men at Work - ignoring all the innuendos though!
3. Everytime- Britney Spears, let's face it, it was inevitable.
4. Bring Me To Life- Evanescence
5. Flying The Flag- Scooch- for lulz!

Summer Songs...
1. Summertime- Dj Jazzy Jeff, The Fresh Prince
2. Mr Vain- Culture Beat
3. Propane Nightmares- Pendulum
4. Pick of Destiny - Tenacious D
5. Summer of '69 - Bryan Adams

I'd offer an explanation but top gear is on!

:-D